Disclaimer: THIS ENTRY WILL BE FULL OF HATE. Long post ahead.

As my fellow tweet-ers would have known, I've been expressing alot of hate on twitter lately. Most of you would have guessed it. Yes, it is ALL about working.

I have been working in this company for 1.5years already, I guess. Everyone is nice to me. Working here is not like any other place that I've worked before and I did liked working here. But things took a bad turn last November(?), ever since my best friend at work resigned. My best friend is quite protective of me at work because I'm still quite young at that point of time. I think it is because of that I did not learn how to defend myself. Anyway, it is time for me to step out of my comfort zone and fend for myself.

And so, I'm going to begin all my hate now. I have a colleague, let's call her J as it is her initial. As told by my colleagues, she is the kind of senior that will bully new staffs. But when I joined the company, I wasn't really bullied by her probably because my manager was always around. But in fact, I felt intimidated by her when I first joined.

Ok, I'm gonna cut the good old days and go back to last November. Last November, I don't know how and when, I started sparking off her hatred for me. Really. I was really clueless then. I kept thinking to myself, did I do something wrong? Why did she suddenly give me so many problems or just bad attitude? Ok, if there is anything I did wrong or inappropriate, the best way to correct me is to tell me. Moreover she is a senior, it would be good if she had told me directly. But she just gave me half-fucked attitude.

And since we are working in the same department, we still have to work together. I, at that time, was really scared and didn't know what to do. In my department, teamwork is really important. And most of the details I need, I HAVE to go through her because her computer has the system but not mine. So it makes working with her really difficult for me. So I pondered over the matter and decide if I should resign. I talked to one of my colleague and this is what he(Let's name him S) told me:
Why are you afraid of her? Given your position, you are anytime above her. So, I don't think that you should resign just because of her. She is just a Clerk.

I thought about it and agreed with S and decide to pressed on. And I started a series of counter attacks. What I did was to further irritate her only. I did not scream at her, hurl vulgarities at her, punch her, push her off the building etc... I only did what she hates and magnify it ten times more.

These are what she did. She likes to:
1. "Tsk" me whenever I walk past her table, which I have to every single day because she is located near the door for entrance and exit.
Somehow, walking past her table become a crime. Dear Lord, please advise me on another route to my table. Should I climb over the partition? THIS IS SO RIDICULOUS!

2. Mumble "shit/useless" whenever I walk past her table.
Suddenly I became a useless and shitty fellow. Even when I smell so much better than her. Even when my language ability is better, I'm deemed as useless. Even when I can't even come up with "Attached for your perusal reference" kind of sentence, I'm deemed as useless. Even when I have a diploma cert, I'm still useless. Oh lord, where are the useful people? Oh did I mention, she don't even have a diploma cert? Pun intended. To top things off, I'm really useless because I helped my supervisors with their excel formulae, reports and drafting email. I think I'm really useless.

3. Subtly hint (ALOUD) that I'm a useless bum/I'm very free at work to fellow colleagues. (I will not go into details of what she say because it is really rude)
Firstly, as I'm going on leave soon, my supervisors instructed me to pass my work to the intern. This news may not be known to all as it is management decision. So most of my work is passed down and my supervisors know it. Secondly, most of my work is passed down through emails that is usually cc-ed to my supervisors. Thirdly, I deal with reports. In all, I would say, she as a CLERK, DO NOT have to know because it is NONE OF HER BUSINESS to poke into my jobscope/workload. And why do I have to report what I did at work to her? I'm only accountable to my supervisors and managers.

4. Intentionally bang the table/slam her drawer whenever I walk past or just suddenly.
I think her intention is to vent her frustrations but it somehow scared me because she is always doing shortly after I walk past her. I think when she sees me she is frustrated or angry? But I think this unknowingly creates a trauma for me. I need a psychiatrist to evaluate my mental condition now. Can I sue her for damaging my mental health? What if I become stupid? But I think she needs to go for some anger management class first.

5. Treat me like I'm invisible.
When I have shipments to deal with, I would have to asked her to process job for finance first. What makes it really unbearable for me was, I have to stand behind her and called out to her for like 5-6times before she responds. And she would usually responds by saying, "what?!" with her back facing me. Oh, how polite? If you think maybe is because I have a bad attitude or sounds rude. But again, for the past 1.5years, I have never spoken to anyone in the company loudly. I can trust that my attitude is ok although I would not say it is excellent.


When there is problem with finance and unable to process the documents. She kept mum about it. Oh really? If I fail my KPI, who's gonna be responsible for it? Is J gonna pay for whatever penalty charges incurred?


Life at work has gradually became a chore. I was really depressed and frustrated at work. I HATED GOING TO WORK. I HATED HOW PEOPLE DID NOT STAND UP FOR ME. I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT THE COMPANY. And that was what she did when my supervisors were not around in the office. You can think that I'm oversensitive to all her actions. Do enlighten me why I'm the only one getting this kind of treatment in office.

I learnt it the hard way. Nobody will fend for you when you are a nobody. You know when I try to be nice, people take it for granted. Now I will be totally anal about everything and anything. Oh, perhaps S would wanna try correcting me? Which part of her bullying me is not a fact? My retaliation may not be the best solution but if you wanna play with me, GAME ON.

Dear S,

If you are thinking of joining forces with J, you are utmost welcome to do so. But please remember to be responsible for your own action and bear the consequences.
Practice what you preach dude. If you can't, don't come riding on your high horses and start teaching me what to do. IT IS SO HYPOCRITICAL! I feel all your hypocritism. I an cringing out, seriously.

Writen with lots of love and hatred,
Del.

Hello everyone! After a long hiatus, I'm back!

Prelims have finally concluded. I must say university life is definitely not easy especially when I have to cope with both my studies and work. Sometimes I find it almost impossible to continue. Not very confident that I will pass all my papers. But I will definitely work harder when exams are nearing.

JIAYOU to my fellow uni mates and all my friends who are in uni now!

Anyway, as I was saying at the beginning of the year, I wanted to get my braces done this year. And true enough, I went for my braces consultation last month. My orthodontist wants me to extract 4 teeth before putting on braces. Sigh!

Anyway, last Thursday I went for my first appointment. Did my mould and extracted 2 teeth. Next week I will be going back to extract 2 more teeth. I was initially quite scared. But I mustered all my courage to step into clinic and extracted two teeth. So now, I'm on liquid diet. Had porridge for the past 3 days.

Sometimes I wonder why I've to pay so much to torture myself. But for pretty teeth, I will endure. Just like what my friends always say:  For better smile, endure!

Anyway, that's all for today. Bye!

Chinese New Year~~~ Super love CNY because... Red packets, good food, new clothes, clean rooms and many many more awesome reasons. Best of all, A SHORT BREAK FROM WORK! *dancing*

Anyway, this year CNY is a little different. CNY eve, we went to relative house for reunion dinner. Before that, I was slogging my guts out because I've been very very busy till the last day. So I have to do everything at the very last minute. My mum kept saying that she is going to strike lottery because I'm helping out with the housework. Hello, I have been doing so. TSK! My (shared) room is my responsibility. I get it! I have been keeping it tidy what.



That concludes my CNY this year (I can't remember if there is any major events). We must do more of friends' house visitings next year! I love all my friends<3 Thank you for being part of my life! That's all folks. Bye!

Hi everyone! I know I know, it has been some time already. I've been really busy with my school stuff because prelims are coming. Stress level keeps increasing. SIGH!

Anyway, this is super backdated. My Titanic, the Artefact Exhibition experience. The exhibition is at the new ArtScience Museum at MBS. Cameras are not allowed, so I did not take any photo in the exhibition hall. I think it is pretty good experience BUT it is very crowded! So, quick! Go see it before it ends! I think the exhibition will last till April.

When we first enter the exhibition hall, we were presented a boarding pass each. At first I couldn't understand why they gave us this pass. Towards the end of the exhibition, there is a really huge board. On it were names of the passengers onboard Titanic. They were classified under 4 broad categories: 1st class cabin, 2nd class cabin, 3rd class cabin and Crews. On this board, we will know if we survived the collision. And fortunately, I (my character) survived! Most of the men and crews died.

Oh, I was a passenger in the 3rd Class cabin. Gina (she is also a third class cabin passenger) and I were whining the whole time and saying how sad our lives have been onboard this vessel. Shihui and Leemin were in first class cabins. TSK!!! There is a really vast difference between the first class and third class cabins. REALLY! But, I can totally understand, for the amount of money you pay, that's the standard you will get. But in the past, a third class cabin ticket would have cost you 1000SGD in present value already. *GASP* That's so expensiveeee!! If we were to pay 1000SGD in present day and get mediocre service standard, we would have made a big fuss out of it.

1. No wifi! They wrote on their website that they offer free wifi. It's actually a SCAM. Throughout our stay there, their receptionist repeatedly told us that their wifi is down.
2. Water heater not functional.
4. No international TV channels.
Other than that, the room is ok. At least the bed is comfortable! Very thankful for that!

As year 2011 is coming to an end, I'm here to do a summary.

Year 2011 has not been a good year for me. I remembered telling my friends that I have bad feelings for this year. And true enough, things hasn't been smooth sailing for me for the longest time. Life has been like a roller coaster ride, full of ups and downs. Nevertheless, I'd walked through all the bad times and is ready to embrace 2012. 2012, you'd better be a good year!

This year, many people left me. Not as in died, as in quit being part of my life. *Cue emo music* Frankly speaking, I really had a hard time dealing with this because when they walked out of my life, I feel really helpless. No doubt, when people leave, new people are bound to enter my life. It is like stepping out of my comfort zone and trying to find a new spot. I'm still trying to cope with these as I know it is inevitable in life. Not in total denial that there are no good people in life anymore. In fact, I met some really nice people along the way too. And those who stayed on, I'm really glad I still have you.

Next, problems with friendships. This has never happened for the past 20 years till this year. It's probably because all of us are growing up. Change in mindsets, views differs. It is really hard to maintain on the same page. After all, we are all pursuing different goals in life. Nevertheless, some friendship will never change.

Problems at work is another huge issue. If you have been following me closely on twitter, you would have known. Anyway, I'm not gonna say it here. All I can say is interpersonal relationship is really important. Likewise, I'm not saying I've been doing a really good job in that but I made sure I respect every single one of them. When I do that, I would expect this to be reciprocal. If you want me to respect you, learn how to respect me first. I believe most of my friends know that I'm really hesitant about tendering my resignation. I have my reasons and I don't expect people to understand. But please understand that whatever I do, I always think through carefully. Decisions are never made on impulse.

The best part of year 2011 is that I get to travel to a few countries. This year, I went to Genting, Thailand and Taiwan. Although I spent a lot of money on all these overseas trips, it is truly enriching and eye-opening.  For year 2012, I hoped to travel to more other countries but keeping my options within Asia first. Someone once told me, you have to conquer Asia first before venturing into European countries. So, I'm gonna conquer Asia! Need more travel khakis!

This year is also marks the beginning of my adulthood. It also means entering into the real society and undertaking more responsibilities and stress. I have a really strong personality. I'm sure I'll be able to cope with whatever that comes along. I had my awesome-est birthday party ever. Felt so loved by everyone. Last but not least, congratulations to my fellow batch of 1990s friends, welcome to adulthood!

Next is my successful enrollment into SIM-UOL for my degree course. I'm really glad that many friends spurred me on when I embarked on this new journey of my life. This is something that I want and hope I can do it. Although the journey is arduous, I'm very sure I can get through it. Although I'm still very worried about my exams next year. And SIM is a money-sucker! Kept paying since July! I think I need to find a 3k job to keep up with my expenditures (school fees). I'm kidding.

Whatever it is, as year 2011 is coming to an end, I wanna put behind all the bad memories and bring the good ones with me to 2012. And in accordance to tradition, I will always draft out my new year's resolution for the new year ahead. And so this is my resolution for next year:

1. Being punctual for work
2. Doing well for exams/be more hardworking
3. Earn/save more money
4. Braces! I MUST DO IT BY END OF THIS YEAR!
5. Get fatter (if that is possible)
6. Good skin!
7. Let this be a secret..

Punctuality has been my greatest weakest. I hope to overcome this by the end of next year. And I'm sure most of you will agree with me. This marks the end of my year and let's welcome 2012 together. *cue katy perry's fireworks* That's all folks! Bye!